Star Trek: Enterprise in 37 Hours

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A few years ago, some of my friends began exploring Star Trek with Max Temkin’s fan guides for The Next Generation in 40 Hours, Deep Space Nine in 82.5 Hours, and my own Voyager in 47 Hours. Well, they’ve been watching – and rewatching! – these (plus The Original Series and The Animated Series), but it took some time to get to Enterprise. You might say (cue the theme song) it’s been a long road getting from there to here… 

What is Star Trek: Enterprise?

The fifth live-action Star Trek television series, Enterprise ran from September 26, 2001 to May 2005. Notably, it aired in the immediate aftermath of Al-Qaeda’s September 11, 2001 attack on the World Trade Center in New York City – an event that would affect how America (and its television shows) looked at the world for years to come. This would impact Enterprise storytelling most notably during the third-season arc, but is also conspicuous in some episodes from the first two seasons. 

In previous series, most characters were members of a technologically advanced military and exploration arm of the United Federation of Planets, known as Starfleet. However, Enterprise takes place during an earlier era where Starfleet is a fledgling United Earth organization that has only been around for a decade or so, and the UFP doesn’t yet exist. Likewise, many technological innovations that other shows took for granted (transporters, photon torpedoes, shields, holodecks, etc) are unknown or in rudimentary stages of development.

The show opens in the year 2151, around 115 years before The Original Series, and features the adventures of Captain Archer and crew aboard the prototype Enterprise (NX-01) starship as they take humanity’s first steps into deep space.

A Bit of Context

As Voyager came to an end, the network naturally wanted to keep the money-making Star Trek franchise going with a new show. The long-running TNG and VOY producers Rick Berman and Brannon Braga initially resisted, wanting to give it a break, but relented when Berman invented the concept of setting this new show between the First Contact film (2063) and TOS (2266). In fact, the entire first season was to be set on Earth during the construction of the first Enterprise.

As expected, this was too big a departure from the traditional Star Trek show the network wanted, and they rejected it. With their creative incentive struck down, Berman and Braga suffered from a lack of new ideas – not to mention burnout – as well as a new writing staff that was mostly gone by the end of the first year. Writing staff would continue to come and go, and it’s generally thought that the early seasons suffer without a fresh, steady hand at the helm. It’s not until season four that we get new showrunner Manny Coto, story editors who were also experienced Star Trek novelists, and several mini-arcs connecting to popular continuity. It’s a bit sad that Enterprise didn’t get a fifth season to see what could have been accomplished.

For many fans, however, the most contentious part of Enterprise is the theme song – a reworked version of Rod Stewart’s “Faith of the Heart” – over the opening credits. The usual instrumental theme was moved to the end credits instead. Many fans seem to hate the opening theme with the passion of an enraged Klingon, so I thought I should mention it going in. Fortunately, we live in the age of digital streaming where you can easily skip it if you don’t like it. 

None of this makes Enterprise unwatchable – or I wouldn’t have made this list – but it’s worth knowing before you get started. Now let’s beam aboard! (Assuming, of course, that the transporter’s been installed…)

How I Chose Episodes

Since the TNG and VOY episode guides both have 40-ish hour lists, I wanted to do the same with Enterprise. I was a little worried about the arcs in seasons 3 and 4 pushing up the episode count, but since ENT only has four seasons, I was able to focus on what I consider to be the ‘essential’ elements of the series. These include: 

  • The Temporal Cold War. Without entering spoiler territory, this plotline focuses on various persons and groups who are using time travel to change or restore history. I’ve tried to include enough of the relevant episodes so that it all makes sense – at least as much as time travel ever does.
  • The Coalition. Other Star Trek series established that humans, Vulcans, Andorians, and Tellarites were the founding members of what would eventually become the United Federation of Planets. I’ve included the episodes that focus on the relationships between these groups and build toward that end goal. Even if I don’t personally like all of these episodes (like season 1’s Shadows of P’Jem), they’re important for continuity’s sake.
  • Treknowlogy. I would have liked to include every single reference to species, organizations, technology and things that appear in later series, but there were just too many. Where it does happen in a major way, I made extra effort to keep it – provided that the episode also has some other merit that makes it worth including. This makes the show even more enjoyable if you’ve seen the previous series.
  • Dramatis Personae. If an episode seriously impacts a character or relationship for the future, I’ve included it in either the essential watchlist (usually) or as an optional bonus episode. 
  • The Xindi Arc (Season 3). While the first two seasons occasionally touched on post 9-11 topics such as terrorism or the detainment of civilians during wartime, it wasn’t until the third season that the show took on a heavily serialized format dealing with related themes. I’ve kept most of this season, excluding only episodes that weren’t vital to the story. 
  • The Season 4 Mini-Arcs. This season mostly features serialized stories told over two or three episodes, all of which are important either to this series or to the Star Trek canon as a whole.

All together, this comes to 53 episodes with a runtime of 42 minutes each – for a total of 37 hours (give or take a few minutes)! Naturally, bonus episodes aren’t included in this total. 

Season One

“Grandma taught me to never judge a species by their eating habits.” – Commander Charles ‘Trip’ Tucker, Broken Bow

With a mostly-human crew who are literally going where no human has gone before, early stories often highlight how they react to new lifeforms, cultural norms, and technology – some that we’ve seen in other shows, and some previously unknown.

Bonus: For each season, I’ve included bonus episodes that I like and/or have good points but didn’t quite make the cut for the 37-hour watchlist. For instance, Unexpected has a silly premise, but also a lot of classic Trek elements and a relaxed pacing that I enjoy. Fortunate Son has an overly simplistic plot, but some interesting world-building that earned it a spot on the bonus list. Silent Enemy has an oddly lightweight B-plot, but intense alien conflict and some tech updates that we’ll see more of later. Shuttlepod One is a bottle episode, but a good one. If you bought into the Ferengi episodes of DS9, Acquisition is a must-have. Vox Sola is sometimes considered an average episode, but I like the alien vibes, and I always enjoy just hanging out with the crew.

Season Two

““Captain, I’m reading bio-signs on the planet. To quote Dr. Frankenstein, “It’s alive.”” – Sub-commander T’Pol, Horizon

This is the show’s most episodic season, paying less attention to the Temporal Cold War or the conflicts with the Vulcans or Andorians. The finale sets up the Xindi arc that will cover the entire third season. 

Bonus: A Night in Sickbay is commonly disliked for goofiness, poor character development, and weak plot – but not by me. Vanishing Point is a transparent ghost story, but it’s good to see more of Hoshi. If you enjoy the Temporal Cold War and time travel shenanigans, look forward to Future Tense. If you want a Mayweather episode, don’t overlook Horizon. Regeneration is a fan favorite, but assumes that the viewer is already familiar with the Borg and the plot of the film First Contact; hence its designation as a bonus episode rather than essential viewing.

Season Three

“I can’t try to save Humanity without holding on to what makes me Human.” – Captain Jonathan Archer, Impulse

Here we have a bold and ambitious season-long story story with obvious metaphors for the United States’ “War on Terror” as well as a great deal of character development for Archer, Trip, and T’Pol.

Note: Selecting the essential episodes for this season was difficult, because any episodes that may be generic, passive, or lacking in strong content still have to make the list if they’re important to the overall arc. I’ve done my best to pare it down, so if you encounter a stray line of dialogue referring to an event you don’t recall, just take my word for it that you’re not missing anything important.

Bonus: Carpenter Street is included because it ties in both to the Xindi arc and the Temporal Cold War, but is a bonus episode because it doesn’t make much impact on either.

Season Four

“Well, that was fun. Can we do it again?” – Lieutenant Malcolm Reed, Terra Prime

This season’s opening episodes bring the Temporal Cold War to an end, and Manny Coto steps up to become showrunner. The show now revels in its status as the first ‘prequel’ series, exploring changes in Vulcan culture, anti-alien sentiments on Earth, the beginnings of the Romulan War (mentioned in other series and continued in the post-series novels), and other continuity with previously established lore. 

Bonus: Daedalus beams in some new old friends and old new technology, while Bound ties up some developments for Trip and T’Pol. The In A Mirror, Darkly arc is another fan favorite, but (like Regeneration) I’ve listed it as ‘bonus’ because you need to have first seen two TOS episodes (S02E10 Mirror, Mirror and S03E09 The Tholian Web) as well as a movie (First Contact) in order to really appreciate it; it’s also completely separate from the rest of the season. 

These Are the Voyages… was developed as a ‘love letter’ to the last 18-year run rather than a real finale for the Enterprise crew. Even Manny Coto – and many disappointed fans – treats Demons/Terra Prime as the true season finale. Personally, I recommend watching the finale and then following it up with the Enterprise novel “The Good That Men Do”; it cleverly retcons These Are the Voyages… into a much more satisfying story. If you’ve no plans to read it, but you still want to watch the episode, let me just say that holodecks are unreliable narrators – and don’t believe everything you see…

There are no Enterprise films in the franchise, though “Admiral Archer’s prized beagle” does get a shoutout in the Star Trek (2009) alternate universe film, and the crew receives a nice mention in Those Old Scientists (Strange New Worlds S02E07). Fortunately, if you want more Enterprise, it does have a robust series of novels – some set during the period of the show, but most continuing the story beyond the finale.

At this time, the modern shows (Discovery, Picard, Lower Decks, and Strange New Worlds) have relatively short seasons, so I don’t see any need for ‘essential episode’ guides for those. I might still make one for The Original Series, though! If you’re interested, you can comment here or tweet at me @plebotamus.

If tabletop roleplaying games are something you’re interested in, please check out my current catalog here. I’ve been in the industry since 2001, with my most recent works published under my own Brabblemark Press. 

Star Trek: Voyager in 47 Hours

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Upon my recommendation, some of my friends are taking their first forays into Star Trek, following along (mostly) with Max Temkin’s fan guides for Star Trek: The Next Generation in 40 Hours and Star Trek: Deep Space Nine in 82.5 Hours. However, since Max hasn’t yet released a guide for Star Trek: Voyager (he’s told me that one is coming!) – but my friends could use it now – I’ve written a brief guide of my own…

crew

What is Star Trek: Voyager?

The fourth live-action Star Trek television series, and the first with a female captain in the lead role, Voyager ran from 1995-2001, following the Original Series (1966-1969) and the Next Generation (1987-1994), and jointly with Deep Space Nine (1993-1999) for part of its run. Most Star Trek series focus on characters who serve in Starfleet, the joint military and exploration arm of the United Federation of Planets – kind of like a United Nations in space.

Voyager is set about 350 years from now, about 100 years later than TOS and roughly the same time as TNG and DS9. It features the adventures of the USS Voyager, a lone starship unexpectedly stranded in the Delta Quadrant (the far side of our galaxy) along with a band of Maquis (freedom fighters; mostly colonists who feel the Federation abandoned their planets to an alien race). Together, the two crews face a 75-year voyage to reach home.

Voyager is a show with many enjoyable – and some truly great – stories, and I can easily plop down in front of my screen and find one. That being said, it does merit some criticism.

voy-threshold3a

A Bit of a Critique

Voyager’s immediate predecessor, Deep Space Nine, is one of the oft-overlooked forerunners of modern television storytelling, featuring significant character development over time, long-running plots and story arc, and a large supporting cast. Voyager, comparatively speaking, takes a half-step backwards.

Despite its premise of a single ship with two crews, lost in uncharted territory, stranded tens of thousands of light years from home, Voyager ignores much of its dramatic potential. For instance, in Stephen Edward Poe’s Star Trek: Voyager: A Vision Of The Future, Executive Producer Rick Berman said: “We wanted to get the Maquis into Starfleet uniforms, with a captain who had to pull together diverse groups of people into a functioning, solid, effective unit. It would get pretty irritating, and cumbersome, to have the Maquis tension in every episode.”  

Other long-running elements of plot and characterization are similarly ignored. Severe season 7hull damage and lost shuttles are restored by the next episode, characters sometimes exhibit personality traits or make moral judgments more appropriate for the past selves that they outgrew seasons ago – and so on. There’s also almost no supporting cast – even though Voyager is a ship of only about 150 persons, so we should be seeing the same faces on a regular basis. Basically, this means that you’re getting an action-adventure version of ‘TNG in the Delta Quadrant’, not the revamp of Battlestar Galactica.

Obviously, these problems don’t make Voyager unwatchable, or I wouldn’t have made this list, but I did think they were important enough to mention before you get started. Now, if I haven’t scared you away, let’s climb aboard!

species-8472

How I Chose Episodes

Since Max managed to reduce TNG into a roughly 40-hour list, I figured I could do the same with Voyager. However, once I realized how many connective threads actually run throughout the show (more than TNG but fewer than DS9), that plan flew out the airlock pretty quickly. Instead, I’ve focused on episodes that include what I consider to be Voyager’s ‘essential’ elements. This includes:

  • The Season 1-2 Arc. The first two seasons are the most serialized, focusing on the interpersonal conflicts between the Starfleet crew and the renegade Maquis, and how they stand together (or not) against the new alien races in this part of the Delta Quadrant. By contrast, seasons 3 and onward are heavily episodic.
  • Dramatis Personae. If an episode introduces a recurring character, race, piece of technology, relationship (or an change in that relationship), that becomes important later, I’ve included it in either the essential watchlist (usually) or as an optional bonus episode.
  • Treknowlegy. Where an episode references a character or event from previous Star Trek series, I made extra effort to keep it – provided that the episode also has some other merit that makes it worth including. This makes the show even more enjoyable if you’ve seen the previous series.
  • Faster Than Faster-Than-Light. I picked episodes where the crew get significantly closer to home, finding themselves in a new part of the Delta Quadrant. Basically, I picked the long jumps, but not necessarily all the short hops and skips.
  • The Borg. The Next Generation established that the Delta Quadrant is home to the cybernetic organisms known as the Borg, so it’s no surprise that they eventually try to assimilate Voyager as well. Once that occurs, the writers are thrilled to have a new toy to play with, so there are many Borg-related episodes from that point on.

All together, this comes to 62 episodes with an average runtime of 45 minutes each – for a total of 47 hours (give or take a few minutes)! Naturally, bonus episodes aren’t included in this total.

A note on numbering: During VOY’s original airing, some stories were split into Part 1 and Part 2, while others were double-length episodes that aired in a single block but were still numbered as two episodes. For modern consistency, this guide has been updated (March 2023) to use episode numbers as they currently appear on Paramount Plus.

season 1 art

Season One

“We’re alone, in an uncharted part of the galaxy. We’ve already made some friends here, and some enemies. We have no idea of the dangers we’re going to face, but one thing is clear. Both crews are going to have to work together if we’re to survive.” – Captain Janeway, “Caretaker”

After the first two seasons of Deep Space Nine, executive producer Michael Piller left to help create Voyager, and I think you can really feel his influence here. Like most Star Trek series, the first two seasons are generally the most uneven and inconsistent, since the writers, producers, cast, and crew are – appropriately enough for this series – all still trying to find their way. However, they do set up the story and character personalities that remain true for the rest of the series.

Bonus: For each season, I’m also listing bonus episodes that are worth watching but just didn’t make the cut for the 47-hour watchlist. For instance, Eye of the Needle is a solid early season ‘Voyager almost gets home episode’. If you want to learn more about Neelix’s backstory, add Jetrel to the list.

  • S01E01-02: Caretaker, Part 1 & 2
  • S01E03: Parallax
    • Bonus | S01E07: Eye of the Needle
  • S01E10: Prime Factors
  • S01E11: State of Flux
    • Bonus | S01E15: Jetrel

season 2 art

Season Two

“If things had happened differently and we were on the Maquis ship now instead of Voyager, would you have served under me?” – Chakotay, “Parallax”

Here I intended to focus mostly on episodes that continue the Kazon and the Voyager/Maquis plotlines from season one, but Projections has a fun tie-in to TNG that I couldn’t skip. Likewise, Cold Fire is a direct sequel to Caretaker. Meld and Deadlock introduce new characters that you’ll see again. Death Wish gives us a thoughtful look at immortality and a guest star from TNG.

Bonus: Threshold is not a good episode, but is infamous throughout the fandom for how much it gets referenced – skipping it would be like driving past the World’s Largest Ball of Twine and not stopping to take a look. The Thaw is a creepy, weird episode with an unusual ending, while Tuvix has possibly the most controversial ending of them all. 

  • S02E03: Projections
  • S02E10: Cold Fire
  • S02E11: Maneuvers
  • S02E14: Alliances
    • Bonus | S02E15: Threshold
  • S02E16: Meld
    • Bonus | S02E18: Death Wish
  • S02E20: Investigations
  • S02E21: Deadlock
    • Bonus | S02E23: The Thaw
    • Bonus | S02E24: Tuvix
  • S02E26: Basics, Part 1

season 3 art

Season Three

“Now up until now the story has been nothing but action, which is fine, but what it needs is a little heart, a little emotion.” – B’Elanna Torres, “Worst Case Scenario”

With the season opener that concludes the previous arc, Jeri Taylor becomes lead showrunner, discarding several previous story arcs and characters, and reframing Voyager as the mostly-episodic adventure show that it remains for the rest of the series.

Flashback is the series’ nod to Star Trek’s 30th anniversary, and ties in to Star Trek VI: the Undiscovered Country – one of the better films. Future’s End is a silly but fun time-travel romp. Unity and Before and After preface later episodes, while Scorpion significantly affects all seasons to come.

Bonus: Remember is an allegorical piece originally conceived for TNG, but it works well here. Jennifer Lien (Kes) gets to stretch her acting chops in Warlord. Macrocosm is Voyager meets Alien meets Die Hard. Real Life is an emotionally heavy character piece for the Doctor. Distant Origin introduces an alien race later seen in Star Trek Online.

  • S03E01: Basics, Part 2
  • S03E02: Flashback
    • Bonus | S03E06: Remember
  • S03E08: Future’s End, Part 1
  • S03E09: Future’s End, Part 2
    • Bonus | S03E10: Warlord
    • Bonus | S03E12: Macrocosm
  • S03E17: Unity
  • S03E21: Before and After
    • Bonus | S03E22: Real Life
  • S03E25: Worst Case Scenario
  • S03E26: Scorpion, Part 1

season 4 art

Season Four

“Seven of Nine, Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix Zero One. But you may call me Seven of Nine.” – Seven of Nine, “Scorpion, Part II”

The show reaches a huge turning point with the introduction of Jeri Ryan (Seven of Nine). She would go on to become one of the most popular characters, but with no money in the budget to pay for an additional main cast member, Jennifer Lien (Kes) was let go. Garrett Wang (Harry Kim) was also considered for the firing line, but a timely People Magazine award as one of the “50 Most Beautiful People in the World” influenced the producers to keep him instead. Personally, I think Lien was the better actor with more potential to develop, and I would have loved her to stay on as a recurring character.

Day of Honor alternated between the essential and bonus lists many times, but its solid character work earned its final slot. The Raven is an important background episode for Seven. Year of Hell could have been a season-long arc, and I would’ve been happy with that. Living Witness is the closest to a ‘Mirror Universe’ tale that we’ll get on VOY.

Bonus: Scientific Method is memorably creepy, though we’ve seen similar in TNG before. Mortal Coil is a well-regarded Neelix episode; it just doesn’t work for me. The Killing Game also doesn’t work for me, but if you really want to know more about the Hirogen, it’s a game worth playing. The Omega Directive is one of Kate Mulgrew’s (Janeway) favorite episodes.

  • S04E01: Scorpion, Part 2
  • S04E02: The Gift
  • S04E03: Day of Honor
  • S04E06: The Raven
    • Bonus | S04E07: Scientific Method
  • S04E08: Year of Hell, Part 1
  • S04E09: Year of Hell, Part 2
    • Bonus | S04E12: Mortal Coil
  • S04E14: Message in a Bottle
  • S04E15: Hunters
  • S04E16: Prey
    • Bonus | S04E21: The Omega Directive
  • S04E23: Living Witness
  • S04E26: Hope and Fear

season 5 art

Season Five

“Welcome to Planet X.” – Tom Paris, “Bride of Chaotica!”

Brannon Braga takes over the lead showrunner role, while Seven, Janeway, and the Doctor step even further into the spotlight.The outrageous silliness of Bride of Chaotica! makes it one of my absolute favorites, and I just couldn’t leave it off the list. Dark Frontier is a cinematic spectacle, and Equinox (like Year of Hell before it) takes a hard look at what Voyager could have been.

Bonus: Watch Extreme Risk if you can’t stand not knowing where their new shuttle comes from. Try Infinite Regress to see Jeri Ryan’s diverse range. DS9 fans will recognize a tie-in to the Occupation of Bajor in Nothing Human. Latent Image features one of Robert Picardo’s most dramatic performances. Bliss is perhaps the quintessential Voyager episode. If you still like John Hughes movies, you might enjoy Someone to Watch Over Me.

  • S05E01: Night
  • S05E02: Drone
    • Bonus | S05E03: Extreme Risk
  • S05E06: Timeless
    • Bonus | S05E07: Infinite Regress
    • Bonus | S05E08: Nothing Human
  • S05E09: Thirty Days
  • S05E10: Counterpoint
    • Bonus | S05E11: Latent Image
  • S05E12: Bride of Chaotica!
    • Bonus | S05E14: Bliss
  • S05E15: Dark Frontier, Parts 1 and 2
    • Bonus | S05E21: Someone to Watch Over Me
  • S05E23: Relativity
  • S05E25: Equinox, Part 1

season 6 art

Season Six

“I traveled halfway across the galaxy to treat you. The least you could do is show a little gratitude!” – The Doctor, “Life Line”

The sixth season continues along much like seasons four and five, though we do get a few episodes (One Small Step, Pathfinder, Blink of an Eye, and Life Line) that break with the typical format.

Bonus: Barge of the Dead is an unusual Klingon mythology episode originally conceived for DS9. Alice is clearly inspired by a certain story by Stephen King. Dragon’s Teeth and Ashes to Ashes introduce aliens later seen in Star Trek Online. Live Fast and Prosper is a bit of fun with one of the best titles ever. Muse is a quiet drama with Shakespearean elements.

  • S06E01: Equinox, Part 2
    • Bonus | S06E03: Barge of the Dead
  • S06E04: Tinker Tenor Doctor Spy
    • Bonus | S06E05: Alice
  • S06E08: One Small Step
  • S06E10: Pathfinder
  • S06E12: Blink of an Eye
  • S06E16: Collective
  • S06E19: Child’s Play
    • Bonus | S06E21: Live Fast and Prosper
    • Bonus | S06E22: Muse
  • S06E23: Fury
  • S06E24: Life Line
  • S06E26: Unimatrix Zero, Part 1

season 7 art

Season Seven

“Hey, save some for the rest of us.” – Harry Kim, “Homestead”

Kenneth Biller steps into the showrunner role to close out the last season with a bang, and though I would have preferred he did so with a multi-episode arc (or at least an epilogue), we do get some good ensemble work. Drive accelerates some character relationships, while Homestead settles one for good. TNG’s influence is obvious in Author, Author (by way of Measure of a Man), while Endgame definitely takes some inspiration from All Good Things, but both still have enough merit to stand on their own.

Bonus: Jeri Ryan’s mimicry in Body and Soul is so impressive that I have to remind myself it’s not real. I hope Prophecy becomes relevant to legacy shows beyond its current relevance to the VOY novels and Star Trek Online, but we’ll have to wait and see. Workforce is a strong ensemble piece. Human Error isn’t divine, but if you’re willing to forgive that, it does have some small references that come back in the finale. 

  • S07E01: Unimatrix Zero, Part 2
  • S07E02: Imperfection
  • S07E03: Drive
  • S07E06: Inside Man
    • Bonus | S07E07: Body and Soul
  • S07E10: Shattered
  • S07E11: Lineage
    • Bonus | S07E13: Prophecy
    • Bonus | S07E15: Workforce, Part 1
    • Bonus | S07E16: Workforce, Part 2
    • Bonus | S07E18: Human Error
  • S07E19: Author, Author
  • S07E20: Friendship One
  • S07E22: Homestead
  • S07E24: Endgame, Parts 1 and 2

There are no Voyager films in the Star Trek franchise, although Janeway does make a very brief appearance in the TNG film Nemesis. However, if you want to follow the crew after the abrupt Endgame finale, there are over a dozen novels in its ‘relaunch’ series. 

With the exception of the so-far-untitled Captain Picard series that’s currently scheduled for late 2019, there are no more television series that take place after Voyager, at least chronologically – but I’m thinking about making guides for the Original Series and for its prequel Enterprise series. If there’s any interest, you can comment here or tweet at me @plebotamus.

I’ve also been in the tabletop roleplaying game industry since 2001, with my most recent works published under my own company, Brabblemark Press. If RPGs are something you’re interested in, you can browse my current catalog here.

Cyberpunk 2020 ‘Remastered’

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I really enjoy noodling over ideas about how older games could be ‘remastered’ (not in terms of rules, purely graphic design). One particular book I’ve been thinking about recently is Cyberpunk 2020, and how it would look if I were given the chance to redesign it.

Now first let me say that I LOVE the original rpg for its evocative design – but it is a bit cramped in places, and very much a product of its time (not that that’s a bad thing). So, I managed to squeeze in a few hours at the computer last night and designed a few pages (for digest/tablets at 6″x9″ instead of 8.5″11″). The art pieces are leftovers that I had planned for my Corporia RPG – which uses a similar graphic design – but I never found a good place to fit them, and I’m not sure what future supplement I might put them in.

I’ve posted the three new design pages here, though you can grab higher-res versions in a PDF from my Google Drive if you want them.

It’s just a draft, and there are some thing I’d tweak if I were doing a full book, but as a design exercise I like the way it turned out.

Notes:

When I was considering how to tweak the original, I realized that Cyberpunk doesn’t really say ‘punk’ to me as much as ‘cyber’. So, noticing that punk-oriented graphic designs I’ve seen tend to work heavily in black, white, yellow, and pink, I focused on those colors, while keeping the original Cyberpunk-red.

I’m also proud of the new ‘Lena Goldsmith’ quote I came up with for the cover. I think it gives a flavor for the setting as well as the original ‘Johnny Silverhands’, but it scans/flows more smoothly.

Of course, this was made just for my own enjoyment and to stretch my brain creatively. Any sampled logos, text, and such are still trademark and copyright R. Talsorian Games Inc. and respective owners.

Update

Leave a reply

As you can see, I’m not really using this blog much. It’s difficult to find time to post blog content when there are so many other things to write, and so many social media alternatives for getting my thoughts out there quickly.

To reach me, your best bets are:

My personal twitter

Brabblemark Press on twitter

Brabblemark Press on Facebook

Brabblemark Press website

my personal Google+ page

MASHED on Google+

Corporia on Google+

The MASHED RPG is now in open playtest

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As you may have seen if you’re following me on social media, I’ve finally posted the open playtest PDF for the MASHED RPG! I’ve been working on it for a year, off and on in my spare time, and I MASHED_playtest_v160424_coverthink it turned out pretty well. I intend to run a Kickstarter a few months down the road, but right now I want to spend at least 2-3 months playtesting. I’d like all the playtest comments to go in my new MASHED RPG group on Google+, if you have any, but you can also get me on Facebook and twitter as well.

If you’d like to check it out, you can get the PDF via direct download from Dropbox or on DriveThruRPG. It’s free, of course.

What It Is

MASHED is a story game that you play with your friends. It’s a game that’s based more on conversations than on rolling dice—though you’ll use those too. Everything that you say crafts an ongoing narrative, like a stage play where everyone’s ad-libbing their lines. The rules and dice are there to help this along, adding an element of randomness that lets you succeed in what you want to do—but also ensuring that that there will be consequences and complications, especially when you fail. After all, war is hell.

You take on the role of an Army Medical Corps nurse, physician, or corpsman assigned to the 8099th Mobile Army Surgical Hospital in South Korea. It is the summer of 1951, one year after the United Nations’ entry into the “police action” that will later be called the Korean War. It’s a game about medics whose government sent them to a foreign land with little to no military training. It’s about men and women who spent their working hours cutting, sawing, snipping, and sewing up human bodies, sometimes those of their friends—and were expected to stay sane.

This is a game about the value of human life and the stress that war imposes on those who live through it—but it’s also about relationships. And courage. And laughter. And love. Although the medics may spend hours—even days—in the operating tent, the game abstracts these into much shorter scenes, focusing on the most dramatic moments. Most of the conversation actually occurs outside of surgery, in those times when the flow of casualties has ebbed. Here you may fall in or out of love, fight the orders of ineffective top brass, pull pranks, help the South Koreans, pick fights, seduce your way through the unit, pull rank, and more. If you can find ways to blow off the stresses of surgery and war, you might get rotated home with your sanity intact. Just remember
that you’re practicing medicine in a combat zone—and death isn’t confined to the operating tent.

First Look: MASHED playsheet draft

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I’m making good progress on my Korean War RPG (working title still: MASHED), based on the Apocalypse World engine. I’m almost finished with the second draft; I just need to edit a little bit of text and include rough layouts of the hospital tents, camp, and both basic and deluxe playsheets. Here’s what I have so far for the deluxe playsheet. Any thoughts?

playsheet_draft2_p1

playsheet_draft2_p2

 

The Clay that Woke

2014 Indie RPG Awards

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The results of the 2014 Indie RPG awards are here! No, I’m not a year late. Unlike many other gaming award events, the year is not when the awards were announced (e.g., the Origins 2015 awards), but the year in which the products were published. I’m told the results were announced at GenCon Indy, but I missed the announcement until this week.

You can see all of the submitted games here, all submitted supplements (for independent RPGs) here, and the links to the final awards here, but to summarize:

Indie Game of the Year (1 winner, 8 runners-up): The Clay that Woke by Paul Czege

Indie Supplement of the Year (1 winner, 6 runners-up): Deep Carbon Observatory by Patrick Stuart and Scrap Princess (a mid-level supplement for Lamentations of the Flame Princess)

Best Support (1 winner, 7 runners-up): Deep Carbon Observatory by Patrick Stuart and Scrap Princess

Best Production (1 winner, 7 runners-up): A Red and Pleasant Land by Zak S.

The list of voters is private, but you have to be one of the “established authors of other independently-created RPGs, who have wrestled with the same problems and have a continued interest in the field. Anyone who has released two or more indie RPG designs (commercial or free) over two or more years” and you have to contact the website if you want to be considered as a voter.

Personally, I’d be very interested to know how many voters there actually are. A dozen? Fifty? Three? Since many of the same games appear multiple times in the lists of winners and runners-up, I’d guess that the voting pool is fairly small, but I could be wrong.

Regardless, if you’re looking for some unfamiliar RPGs to try, the full list would be a great place to start looking!

 

 

2015 ENnie Award Results

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Last week, I made my annual ENnie award predictions. Not my personal preferences – just who I thought would probably win based solely on fan demographics and my best guesses. I was actually less successful than last year, which pleases me – since it means that more votes were cast based on quality than just on name recognition, which is how these categories often go.ROLCoverdisplay-350x350

Spoiler: I’m frankly stunned that A Red & Pleasant Land did so well, especially against D&D. It was a great looking product, but compared to D&D it had a much smaller press run, and its creator Zak S. is quite a controversial figure – so I didn’t expect it to place at all, much less four times! Congrats to Zak S. for blowing me away!

Best Adventure (let’s call this one 25% right)

SILVER WINNER A Red & Pleasant Land (Lamentations of the Flame Princess)
SILVER PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER Horror on the Orient Express (Chaosium)
GOLD PREDICTION Hoard of the Dragon Queen (Wizards of the Coast)

Best Aid/Accessory (50% right)

GOLD PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER D&D Dungeon Master’s Screen (Wizards of the Coast)
SILVER WINNER Black-green Call of Cthulhu 7th Edition RPG Dice Set (Q-Workshop)
SILVER PREDICTION Pathfinder Cards: Deluxe Harrow Deck (Paizo Inc.)

Best Art, Interior (Hey, 100% correct!)

GOLD PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER D&D Monster Manual (Wizards of the Coast)
SILVER PREDICTION/SILVER WINNER The Strange (Monte Cook Games, LLC)

Best Art, Cover (50% right on this one)

SILVER PREDICTION Freeport: The City of Adventure for the Pathfinder RPG (Green Ronin Publishing)
SILVER WINNER Achtung! Cthulhu: Terrors of the Secret War (Modiphius Entertainment Ltd)
GOLD PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER Rise of Tiamat (Wizards of the Coast)

Best Blog  (I had no idea on these, but I did say that ConTessa was probably my alternate silver, so I wasn’t tooooo far off. I’ll call this one 25% right.)

ALT SILVER PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER ConTessa – Tabletop gaming by women for everyone!
GOLD PREDICTION/SILVER WINNER Gnome Stew
SILVER PREDICTION NERD TREK

Best Cartography (well, I did say I had no idea who would get the silver. 50% right.)

SILVER WINNER The Guide to Glorantha (Moon Design Publications)
SILVER PREDICTION Horror on the Orient Express (Chaosium)
GOLD PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER Ninth World Guidebook (Monte Cook Games, LLC)

Best Electronic Book (another 25% result; I shouldn’t have broken my rule of “D&D = GOLD”)

GOLD PREDICTION Dragon Age Core RuleBook (Green Ronin Publishing)
SILVER PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER Basic Rules for D&D (Wizards of the Coast)
SILVER WINNER Ken Writes About Stuff Volume 2 (Pelgrane Press)

Best Family Game (100% right on this one)

SILVER PREDICTION/SILVER WINNER Atomic Robo: The Roleplaying Game (Evil Hat Productions)
GOLD PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER D&D Starter Set (Wizards of the Coast)

Best Free Product (Only 50% again)

GOLD PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER Basic Rules for D&D (Wizards of the Coast)
SILVER PREDICTION Doctor Who: Adventures in Time and Space – Arrowdown (Cubicle 7 Entertainment Ltd.)
SILVER WINNER 13th Age: The Archmage’s Orrery (Pelgrane Press)

Best Game (100% right again)

GOLD PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER D&D Player’s Handbook (Wizards of the Coast)
SILVER PREDICTION/SILVER WINNER The Strange (Monte Cook Games, LLC)

Best Miniatures Product (I should have known to pick D&D, even though Wizards didn’t produce it; I’ll call this one 25%)

GOLD WINNER D&D Icons of the Realms: Elemental Evil Boosters (WizKids)
GOLD PREDICTION/SILVER WINNER Pathfinder Pawns: Inner Sea Pawn Box (Paizo Inc.)
SILVER PREDICTION Iron Kingdoms Unleashed Roleplaying Game Adventure Kit (Privateer Press)

Best Monster/Adversary (50%)

GOLD PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER D&D Monster Manual (Wizards of the Coast)
SILVER PREDICTION The Strange Bestiary (Monte Cook Games, LLC)
SILVER WINNER Achtung! Cthulhu: Terrors of the Secret War (Modiphius Entertainment Ltd)

Best Podcast (50%)

GOLD PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER Ken and Robin Talk About Stuff
SILVER WINNER Miskatonic University Podcast
SILVER PREDICTION Translating the Strange

Best Production Values (100%)

SILVER PREDICTION/SILVER WINNER Horror on the Orient Express (Chaosium)
GOLD PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER D&D Starter Set (Wizards of the Coast)

Best RPG Related Product (oops! close, but no cigar – let’s call it 25%)

GOLD WINNER Designers & Dragons: A History of the Roleplaying Game Industry (Evil Hat Productions)
SILVER PREDICTION Shadowrun: Crossfire (Catalyst Game Labs)
GOLD PREDICTION/SILVER WINNER Temple of Elemental Evil (WizKids)

Best Rules (50% right)

GOLD PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER D&D Player’s Handbook (Wizards of the Coast)
SILVER WINNER MUTANT: Year Zero – The Roleplaying Game (Modiphius Entertainment Ltd)
SILVER PREDICTION Monster of the Week (Evil Hat Productions)

Best Setting (way off again! I’ll call this 25%)

GOLD PREDICTION/SILVER WINNER The Strange (Monte Cook Games, LLC)
GOLD WINNER A Red & Pleasant Land (Lamentations of the Flame Princess)
SILVER PREDICTION Trail of Cthulhu: Dreamhounds of Paris (Pelgrane Press)

Best Software (I said Hero Lab was my alternate silver, so at least there’s that… I’ll call it 75%)

GOLD PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER Roll20 (Roll 20)
SILVER PREDICTION D&D Complete Core Monster Pack for Fantasy Grounds (SmiteWorks USA LLC)
SILVER WINNER Hero Lab (Lone Wolf Development)

Best Supplement (100% correct)

GOLD PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER D&D Dungeon Master’s Guide (Wizards of the Coast)
SILVER PREDICTION/SILVER WINNER Pathfinder RPG: Pathfinder Unchained (Paizo Inc.)

Best Website (I based my guesses on last year, and said “I can see these swapping” – so I was only partly right; I’ll call it 25% again)

SILVER WINNER Tabletop Audio
GOLD PREDICTION Adventureaweek
SILVER PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER The Escapist

Best Writing (25%, I suppose)

GOLD PREDICTION/SILVER WINNER D&D Player’s Handbook by Jeremy Crawford, James Wyatt, Robert J. Schwalb, Bruce R. Cordell (Wizards of the Coast)
SILVER PREDICTION The Strange by Monte Cook, Bruce R. Cordell (Monte Cook Games, LLC)
GOLD WINNER A Red & Pleasant Land by Zak S (Lamentations of the Flame Princess)

Product of the Year (50%)

SILVER PREDICTION The Strange (Monte Cook Games, LLC)
SILVER WINNER A Red & Pleasant Land (Lamentations of the Flame Princess)
GOLD PREDICTION/GOLD WINNER D&D Player’s Handbook (Wizards of the Coast)

 

 

My 2015 ENnie Award Predictions!

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The ENnie award winners will be announced at GenCon tomorrow, but before that happens I thought I’d repeat what I did last year and announce my predictions for the winners.

The full nominees list is below. Keep in mine that these are not my personal preferences – I’ve just annotated who I think will probably win, based on fan demographics. I really think the new edition of D&D will sweep it, except on occasions when it’s up against Pathfinder, but I might be surprised! Monte Cook, of course, will pull in some good numbers.awards-image

To my thinking, these awards usually go like this: D&D or Pathfinder contending for #1 and #2, Monte Cook #3, Evil Hat #4, Savage Worlds or Cthulhu-based products contending for #5, and then everyone else. For instance, I don’t think Zak S. has a snowball’s chance, even though A Red & Pleasant Land is a great looking product. Maybe if these were judge awards and not fan voting, but A Red & Pleasant Land is too unknown outside of Zak’s circles, and there are too many people he’s pissed off. I’d be pleasantly surprised, though, if this were not the case.

Best Adventure

A Red & Pleasant Land (Lamentations of the Flame Princess)
SILVER Horror on the Orient Express (Chaosium)
GOLD Hoard of the Dragon Queen (Wizards of the Coast)
Cake Walk (Fabled Environments)
East Texas University: Degrees of Horror (Pinnacle Entertainment Group)

Best Aid/Accessory (I can easily see these two getting swapped)

DungeonMorph Dice: Explorer Set (Inkwell Ideas)
GOLD D&D Dungeon Master’s Screen (Wizards of the Coast)
Syrinscape’s Rise of the Runelords Mega SoundPack (Syrinscape)
Black-green Call of Cthulhu 7th Edition RPG Dice Set (Q-Workshop)
SILVER Pathfinder Cards: Deluxe Harrow Deck (Paizo Inc.)

Best Art, Interior (Trail of Cthulhu is my alternate silver; if it weren’t for D&D and Monte, I’d pick it for gold)

GOLD D&D Monster Manual (Wizards of the Coast)
Interface Zero 2.0: Full Metal Cyberpunk (Gun Metal Games)
Trail of Cthulhu: Dreamhounds of Paris (Pelgrane Press)
SILVER The Strange (Monte Cook Games, LLC)
Iron Kingdoms Unleashed Core Rules Hardcover (Privateer Press)

Best Art, Cover

Iron Kingdoms Full Metal Fantasy Monsternomicon (Privateer Press)
MUTANT: Year Zero – The Roleplaying Game (Modiphius Entertainment Ltd)
SILVER Freeport: The City of Adventure for the Pathfinder RPG (Green Ronin Publishing)
Achtung! Cthulhu: Terrors of the Secret War (Modiphius Entertainment Ltd)
GOLD Rise of Tiamat (Wizards of the Coast)

Best Blog  (no idea for silver, really, but ConTessa is probably my alternate silver)

ConTessa – Tabletop gaming by women for everyone!
DMDavid Blog
GOLD Gnome Stew
House Rule Gaming
SILVER NERD TREK

Best Cartography (no idea for silver, really…)

MUTANT: Year Zero – The Roleplaying Game (Modiphius Entertainment Ltd)
The Guide to Glorantha (Moon Design Publications)
Distant Outposts Deluxe Poster Map Set (Christopher West’s Maps of Mastery)
SILVER Horror on the Orient Express (Chaosium)
GOLD Ninth World Guidebook (Monte Cook Games, LLC)

Best Electronic Book (these two could easily swap)

GOLD Dragon Age Core RuleBook (Green Ronin Publishing)
SILVER Basic Rules for D&D (Wizards of the Coast)
Ken Writes About Stuff Volume 2 (Pelgrane Press)
Cake Walk (Fabled Environments)
Valiant Universe RPG Digital Initiative (Catalyst Game Labs)

Best Family Game (Doctor Who is my alternate silver)

SILVER Atomic Robo: The Roleplaying Game (Evil Hat Productions)
GOLD D&D Starter Set (Wizards of the Coast)
Infestation, An RPG of Bugs and Heroes (Third Eye Games)
Doctor Who: Adventures in Time and Space – Limited Edition Anniversary Rulebook (Cubicle 7 Entertainment Ltd.)
Adventure Maximus RPG Starter Set (Eden Studios)

Best Free Product

Valiant RPG Digital Initiative (Catalyst Game Labs)
GOLD Basic Rules for D&D (Wizards of the Coast)
SILVER Doctor Who: Adventures in Time and Space – Arrowdown (Cubicle 7 Entertainment Ltd.)
13th Age: The Archmage’s Orrery (Pelgrane Press)
East Texas University: Redneckromancer (Pinnacle Entertainment Group)

Best Game (Firefly has a good shot at silver, as does Atomic Robo, but I think the ENWorld readership may pick Monte instead)

GOLD D&D Player’s Handbook (Wizards of the Coast)
SILVER The Strange (Monte Cook Games, LLC)
Firefly Roleplaying Game (Margaret Weis Productions)
MUTANT: Year Zero – The Roleplaying Game (Modiphius Entertainment Ltd)
Atomic Robo: The Roleplaying Game (Evil Hat Productions)

Best Miniatures Product

Gen Con Adventurer’s Tavern – Painted (Games and Gears)
D&D Icons of the Realms: Elemental Evil Boosters (WizKids)
Fantasy Pirate Goblin Lieutnant 28mm Miniature (Via Ludibunda)
GOLD Pathfinder Pawns: Inner Sea Pawn Box (Paizo Inc.)
SILVER Iron Kingdoms Unleashed Roleplaying Game Adventure Kit (Privateer Press)

Best Monster/Adversary

GOLD D&D Monster Manual (Wizards of the Coast)
13th Age Bestiary (Pelgrane Press)
SILVER The Strange Bestiary (Monte Cook Games, LLC)
Iron Kingdoms Full Metal Fantasy Monsternomicon (Privateer Press)
Achtung! Cthulhu: Terrors of the Secret War (Modiphius Entertainment Ltd)

Best Podcast

GOLD Ken and Robin Talk About Stuff
Miskatonic University Podcast
SILVER Translating the Strange
NPC Cast
Grim Dark Podcast

Best Production Values (Iron Kingdoms or Shadowrun are my silver runners-up)

SILVER Horror on the Orient Express (Chaosium)
GOLD D&D Starter Set (Wizards of the Coast)
The Guide to Glorantha (Moon Design Publications)
Iron Kingdoms Unleashed Roleplaying Game Adventure Kit (Privateer Press)
Shadowrun: Runner’s Toolkit: Alphaware (Catalyst Game Labs)

Designers & Dragons: A History of the Roleplaying Game Industry (Evil Hat Productions)
Chicks Dig Gaming: A Celebration of All Things Gaming by the Women Who Love It (Mad Norwegian Press)
SILVER Shadowrun: Crossfire (Catalyst Game Labs)
GOLD Temple of Elemental Evil (WizKids)
Doctor Who: The Card Game 2nd Edition (Cubicle 7 Entertainment Ltd.)

Best Rules

GOLD D&D Player’s Handbook (Wizards of the Coast)
MUTANT: Year Zero – The Roleplaying Game (Modiphius Entertainment Ltd)
Mindjammer – The Roleplaying Game (Transhuman Science-Fiction Adventure in the Second Age of Space) (Modiphius Entertainment Ltd)
At the Hands of an Angry God (BlackWyrm Games)
SILVER Monster of the Week (Evil Hat Productions)

Best Setting

GOLD The Strange (Monte Cook Games, LLC)
The Guide to Glorantha (Moon Design Publications)
MUTANT: Year Zero – The Roleplaying Game (Modiphius Entertainment Ltd)
A Red & Pleasant Land (Lamentations of the Flame Princess)
SILVER Trail of Cthulhu: Dreamhounds of Paris (Pelgrane Press)

Best Software (I can easily see these two getting swapped; Hero Lab is my alternate silver)

GOLD Roll20 (Roll 20)
SILVER D&D Complete Core Monster Pack for Fantasy Grounds (SmiteWorks USA LLC)
Hero Lab (Lone Wolf Development)
Syrinscape’s Rise of the Runelords Mega SoundPack (Syrinscape)
Eclipse Phase: Singularity Character Generator (Posthuman Studios & Snow Dog Labs)

Best Supplement (This is a tough one. All of these have great name recognition. My alternate silver is Savage Worlds.)

GOLD D&D Dungeon Master’s Guide (Wizards of the Coast)
SILVER Pathfinder RPG: Pathfinder Unchained (Paizo Inc.)
Savage Worlds Science Fiction Companion (Pinnacle Entertainment Group)
Doctor Who – The Fourth Doctor Sourcebook (Cubicle 7 Entertainment Ltd.)
Shadowrun: Run Faster (Catalyst Game Labs)

Best Website (I can see these swapping)

Tabletop Audio
GOLD Adventureaweek
Age of Ravens
SILVER The Escapist
The Illuminerdy

Best Writing (Designers & Dragons has a decent shot at silver, but I don’t think it can beat Monte)

Ken Writes About Stuff Volume 2 by Kenneth Hite (Pelgrane Press)
GOLD D&D Player’s Handbook by Jeremy Crawford, James Wyatt, Robert J. Schwalb, Bruce R. Cordell (Wizards of the Coast)
SILVER The Strange by Monte Cook, Bruce R. Cordell (Monte Cook Games, LLC)
A Red & Pleasant Land by Zak S (Lamentations of the Flame Princess)
Designers & Dragons: A History of the Roleplaying Game Industry by Shannon Appelcline (Evil Hat Productions)

Product of the Year

MUTANT: Year Zero – The Roleplaying Game (Modiphius Entertainment Ltd)
SILVER The Strange (Monte Cook Games, LLC)
Horror on the Orient Express (Chaosium)
A Red & Pleasant Land (Lamentations of the Flame Princess)
The Guide to Glorantha (Moon Design Publications)
GOLD D&D Player’s Handbook (Wizards of the Coast)
Iron Kingdoms Unleashed Core Rules Hardcover (Privateer Press)
Designers & Dragons: A History of the Roleplaying Game Industry (Evil Hat Productions) Firefly Roleplaying Game (Margaret Weis Productions)
Mindjammer – The Roleplaying Game (Transhuman Science-Fiction Adventure in the Second Age of Space) (Modiphius Entertainment Ltd)

 —-

Okay, that’s it! I put about 20 minutes into guessing these, and I think they’ll probably turn out to be pretty close.  I’ll post a follow-up to see how I did.

RPG Design: Less is More, Bold is Better

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As a long-time writer but an amateur graphic designer, I’ve really enjoyed updating the Corporia RPG layout (in preparation for the 7″ x 10″ Print-on-Demand edition and accompanying PDF update). My skills have improved quite a bit since the original was published, after all.

One early review comment I received on the original book was that there were too many pages with ‘walls of text’ (i.e., pages with a big block of body text and not enough white space, art, or headers to provide some relief for the eyes). This was one particular comment I kept in mind throughout the (nearly finished, as I type now) revision process. Although there are still some ‘walls’ here and there, I really tried to break these up a bit. For instance, I overhauled the character archetype pages by swapping the art and text placement, making the color elements and quote bigger and bolder, and replacing paragraphs of text with a simple inset text block. Now instead of a ‘wall of text’, the archetype page includes text, the statistics block, and the color inset block. There’s still a lot of text, but the wall now has some paint and missing bricks.

The color elements add some boldness to these page spreads, and the inset block summarizes paragraphs of text, making it easier to read and comprehend (thus, less is more). It’s something I’ll definitely have to bear in mind during future projects.

Check out the Hacker archetype below to see the ‘before’ and ‘after’. I really like the revision, and it maintains the ‘look and feel’ of the original and so won’t be shockingly different to the existing reader base. What do you think?

ORIGINAL:

Original Version ("Before")

Original Version (“Before”)

REVISED:

Revised Version ("After")

Revised Version (“After”)